I have to be the leader and I am not feeling like I have value if I can't produce income in some way. Being the leader, boss, manager validates me as a person and I don't know how to do this. I kept wanting to find something outside of home. I wanted to work with my adult loved one. I have felt lost and unsure of my purpose. And then yesterday(drum role please) I had a random thought sent from God, you are the leader, the boss, the Manager Of Mayhem (M.O.M.). All the executive roles I want to have and need, to feel validated are all in the home if I change my perspective and realize that I do have value to my loved ones. I know that I knew this but I couldn't put it into action again. As a M.O.M. we don't get raises as validation of a job well done. We do get hugs and kisses. We don't get to travel around the world to save the lives of others. We do save the lives and spirits of the ones we love everyday.
So yesterday I gave myself an executive job evaluation and learned a lot. I realized what I was doing right and what I could change and even that some things need to change but I don't have the answer right now and that's okay.
How are you doing as a Manager Of Mayhem? Are feeling like I did? There is hope, there is a purpose and for me it was just doing what I was doing with a different set of glasses on to see what needs to be done.